Easy Jet

Saturday 19th April Chopin. 1st piano.

Watched people on box , Americans. One, had eighteen private jets, amongst other things, including a wife and children, whom he had to rush to get to (They all took this stance) how far is it from the truth ? A very long way..(they also had to “relax!!! ) One man, a football player, had a five million pound jet.. also to rush to his “wife and children” !!!
Difficult not to look very closely at these creatures, my conclusions are quite obvious.
I remain, sanguine, alone, “relaxed”. I never rush to my wife, because she is always here and whatever I wished too do , I would not need my own jet… The local brothel is just up the road, a cab ride… if I were that way inclined, a fraction of a fraction of the price of a getaway jet to no where, I would not have to hide my penchant from her, she would indeed come and sort the lady for me.. .haggling the price, no doubt… A paragon ??
Clearly these people are inundated with money and have no other way of expressing themselves , simply flaunt that which they have, as the majority of haves, do, mixed with a large amount of vulgarity and greater amounts of sex, spending endless time and endless money, seriously attempting to hide this other side to their existence. I once knew a man who’s whole life was taken up by the charade of hiding his so called “mistress” from his wife. ..So long as it makes him happy… He thought himself so very clever at all the endless tricks he played. Another idiot. The stress helped bring on the cancer which killed him.
Difficult to see also “where they are” what happens when they “momentarily” dare stop, think, they do have that capability…. Interesting.
“Cannery Row” “Clean Slate” “Wages of fear” creep into my head.
Interesting also for me, is at least these people (or some of them) shared my conclusion about closing aircraft, vehicle doors, how they liked the delicate , soft, click, as a Rolls Royce.. about the only thing I could ever see my having in common with these creatures, likewise, I am just another maggot to them.
I have a jet which I usually share with about two hundred other people.. is there so much difference ? I do not have to fly it, accept any responsibility for it, my forte, which has left me precisely where I now am.
Those people who do hear of my antecedents, always screw up their faces when wives , children and grandchildren, are mentioned, mine, whom mostly I have never seen, other than during the initial crescendo.. “How could you walk away?! So many!!“ they screech. “Easy” is always my reply. Invariably they walk away….. “disgust” written on their mean, screwed up faces, reflecting their mean, screwed up minds. Never, ever, considering/asking my position, my point of view, as always , as ever, as I have always been, a non-starter.

Just a thought

Sunday, April 13, 2008……08:36…

Glorious morning . Eroica / Chopin.1/2/

Cyn to “ six churches” I ? I remain sanguine, almost.

Simply wait, sit, no longer fornicate.

After my full stop at the hospital, I remain also at the complete dead end. Time hangs on my head and somewhere between the middle of my body, this slight question mark, this slight tugging tension , even a vague apprehension, then, looking at the other 99% of the population of this Planet, where precisely are they ??

I no longer have any hopes , aspirations, no inclination to rush anywhere, to see anyone, maybe I am fortunate, more than I know or realize. Perhaps, only perhaps, I should do as so many other people do , find some purpose, achievement, something to strive for , or more prosaically, some woman to impress, to run too, hoping deep between her legs there will be the answer. Very few men see so brusquely, so devastatingly, the hidden truth . Over the years I have covered all the ground on this, “the” subject of life, which leaves my self and a few others doubtlessly, simply, as said, “waiting” fully refusing to make some final gesture to existence, in any direction whatsoever, only living for our own ideas but where the other factor savagely trips in “money”, I am still subservient . So very many people who have so much do not “see” their immunity from what for most is the daily drudgery. The rich, those with the full freedom of money, their lives a endless rush to nowhere…. They live to impress, to make some mark on the hard surface of reality, which culminates into just another crumbling edifice, a few ideas remain, mostly with the art/music/writing syndrome. No, I have always side stepped, much to the disgust and indignation of other people, especially the hard female faces, refusing to adhere to “their” conventions, to accept them. A sense of obligation or duty has never been any consideration of mine…only in so far as money itself “demands” In the past I have been quite so gullible as the next man in parting with whatever I possessed to the altar of sex, never going quite so far as nailing myself down, a achievement in itself. The majority of males only realize the implications for their selves when it is far too late, they having been deliberately kept far too busy.
( Odd, peaceful morning and afternoon !) blogged.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008………17:24….. Long day, dress rehearsal for Doctor which was OK but I very tired and spent day in bed.
Quite some straightening out remains in the short time available, all this because I do not have money to continue.
Thought crept into my head, starting with Stef in bed yesterday morning, how languid I felt. I then linked that to my computer game , re “hallucinations” Have I finally stumbled upon the answer to women? That they can develop into a deep hallucination for men in the initial stages, a blindness, a false euphoria, a delusion, a delirium, a fantasy, all wrapped loosely under the cover of “love”?? The reality striking hard when the “damage” insidiously creeping into the situation becomes complete.. i.e. when the female specie achieves her programmed destination and conceives. Then all hell breaks loose, disguised, calmed by society’s conventions ..as the accepted socially and politically correct procedure, something to be “proud and totally committed to” Hell interpreted as heaven… !
“ You have had your four minutes fun, now pay for the rest of your life in every possible, every unimagined, painful way.”
The record holder for taking her clothes off and plunging endlessly, without the slightest hesitation, into this plethora of creation was Alexandria..12 seconds.
Finally, have given Stef a nudge as she could not get out of bed to see me in my last few hours relatively.. let it be known to her I have already left for UK.

The working class can kiss my arse!

'The white working class feels alienated, threatened and voiceless,' says BBC boss

By PAUL REVOIR - Last updated at 23:16pm on 25th February 2008....daily mail

This man is for the chop . Hardly feel this signifies a change in the general tense, anxious, seething perhaps, in the not now quite politically correct atmosphere. Those lumbering, over fed, corrupt, over paid, lecherous, devious creeps in Whitehall and Brussels will not allow their pandering to the Black Vote, their power, to be questioned by some upstart from the BBC , or anyone, anyone at all, regardless. Without the slightest doubt, the first voice dare raised since Blair took over all things. Blair, the sole arbiter of right and wrong , voices in his head telling him this was his mission. He may have better results in Rwanda.

Stefania 2

Monday, February 25, 2008…….09:36
Stef appeared last night , quite cool and unperturbed about all my comments made to her by text, as if nothing had been said or words exchanged. She then went into a very heavy sex routine resulting my having to gag and tie her up…. the noise, her moans and the struggling convulsions her body was going through. All this agony and ecstasy in the name of blunted conception.
About two hours of this and all went calm, she then decided she wished to “talk”, something she rarely does, that she wanted a “small thing” from me , which did not cost much, before I went to the UK, however , she, not talking in the accepted way, but in the 21st century way of texting me on the phone, regardless of my being next to her.
I remained sanguine , waiting for whatever weird notion was in her mind.
“ I would like to dance the Blues with you !” ….Her message.
Momentarily I, completely taken back, it being 2.a.m. and the only blues I could remember were “The blues of the Night” sung by Bing Crosby in the year dot. This I started to sing to the best of my ability and to her acute embarrassment.
She, a very sad, touching, innocent person, innocence being a extremely rare quality, another factor in the 21st century, regardless of her being a being a “business woman” in it’s most significant sense. This side of her life completely different to which she presents to me , or should I say, tries to the best of her ability.
It is now 10.a.m. she had asked me to wake her at 9, as she had a “appointment” she sleeps on. Whomever wants her, will obviously have to wait, a nervous anxiousness prevailing no doubt on his part.
The Sun shines, I drift into another day, a certain peace, a sanity, hangs briefly over my particular spot in Bucuresti . Time ebbs it’s way towards Friday when this segment of my existence is swept away, confronted with the orderly chaos of Gatwick.

Stefania

The final word I had for Stefania was “inevitable”, she, always looking for a bigger cock, as she has done since high school, why should she change and more to the point, how can she change now ? (New years' morning was classic)

It is time.

That five weeks she disappeared were not for a whim,as she implied, she had found something else, but that had collapsed and she came back, briefly, I must quickly add.

Now she has become entwined in the Carrefour scenario which is a life for her and the people in it.

It is not a casual acquaintance that rings a woman at seven in the morning asking if she is getting out of bed.... She, as all other female faces in my existence, thinks, not only am I blind , but also stupid.

Kosovo again...

There has been very little said about the takeover of Kosovo by the Muslim trenchant for breeding their way into a situation . The Western media has been led by the nose to the politically correct side of this particular fence by America, who since WW2 has taken upon itself the task of creating as much trouble in their own interest as is humanly possible and at whatever cost. It has been forgotten that in the first days of the Iraq occupation, the Americans threw $70.000.000. on a table, the money not immediately snatched, being used to play football, much of it simply disappeared. This being the American modus operandus. The words Muslim or Islam nowhere appear in your coverage of this crisis in the Balkans, neither do the interesting facts that Kosovo is sitting on the biggest chrome deposits in the World and that it’s pipeline is far more conducive to the West than that in Turkey. In fact the whole scenario is another political carve up reminiscent of so very many other situations where gain/greed/ corruption are the sole motivation.

There will be a price paid by the West for the bombing of Belgrade and this
new incursion of the Balkans by big business.. in the name of ..Democracy ?? hardly a pleasant word, one synonymous with Enron.

Russia, a large continent adjacent to this situation, is also on the unmentionable list. For myself it will be interesting to see precisely what move this Country will make, anyone who feels that Russia will remain isolated, impervious to what is happening on her Western Front ……

1066 and all that

'We've lost control of our borders for the first time since 1066,' says judge after foreign detainees riot
By JAMES SLACK -Last updated at 21:57pm on 22nd February 2008

Warning: Judge Elwin has said people living in this country, whether legally or illegally, must respect the law
A judge listening to graphic details of an immigration centre riot yesterday warned that Britain had lost control of its borders "for the first time since 1066".
Christopher Elwen gave the dramatic assessment after four foreign nationals were cleared of masterminding the "rampage" at Harmondsworth removal centre.
Two of the men were jailed for the millions of pounds worth of damage caused during the huge disturbance, which left large parts of the 555-bed West London centre wrecked.
Southwark Crown Court in London heard that the mayhem - sparked by complaints about human rights and detainees not having Sky TV - engulfed all four wings.
Staff feared for their lives as many detainees armed themselves with makeshift weapons, damaged walls, destroyed security cameras, smashed windows, shattered furniture and started fires at the privately-run facility.